People who suffer from dementia typically experience a loss of short-term memory before long-term memories deteriorate. Encouraging a senior with dementia to reminisce can provide a sense of self-worth as he recalls something special from the past. These memories can also provide the caregiver with new insight about Valentine’s Day traditions from the past.
Caregivers in various areas may wish to incorporate reminiscing into the schedule some time in February. This might be a group activity at a long-term care facility or other adult care facility, which has the advantage of encouraging social skills and gives others the opportunity to hear memories as well. One-on-one reminiscing may also be done in facilities as well as home settings.
Remembering Valentine’s Day Celebrations in the Past
The stores are brimming with cards of love for adults and children. Florists prepare for Valentine's Day with bouquets of roses and other cut flowers while boxes of chocolates and holiday candies fill the Valentine's section of many stores today. Hotels may offer special sweetheart packages while restaurants anticipate larger crowds on February 14. Heart-shaped balloons may rise to the ceiling while shoppers find a wide variety of other gifts to say “I love you.”
Seniors may remember school days of exchanging Valentine's cards with classmates. Perhaps they made the cards with handwritten messages. Some may have purchased cards with a box of smaller ones and that one big Valentine for a special somebody. Other small gifts may have been exchanged among students and family members as well.
Some seniors have had the same spouse since their teen years, and those precious memories of courtship and perhaps even a little mischief may bring a twinkle to the older adults’ eyes. Perhaps someone suffering from dementia may not remember what she had for breakfast or the name of the animal with a bushy tail that is eating nuts outside may elude her, but ask about dating her husband and the stories may just keep coming.
Valentine’s Day Reminiscing Ideas
Ideas for questions that may jog a senior’s memories of Valentine’s Day include:
- How did you celebrate Valentine’s Day when you were a child at school?
- Did you ever have a crush on a teacher or other adult as a child?
- Did you have a sweetheart when you were young?
- Did someone have a crush on you when you were a kid?
- Did you make any handmade Valentine cards? If so, what sort of materials did you use to make the cards?
- Do any songs remind you of your Valentine?
- What were some of your favorite Valentine gifts that you received?
Tips for Successful Reminiscing
Here are some helpful hints for making reminiscing a pleasant experience for everyone:
- Always treat seniors with dignity and respect, remembering that they are unique and that each person has his own story and memories.
- Some seniors may not celebrate Valentine’s Day due to cultural or religious influences.
- Listen for non-verbal and verbal cues. If the subject seems to make the senior uncomfortable, feel free to move to another subject – the older adult may be able to recall quite a bit of information about George Washington, whose birthday is celebrated in America soon after Valentine’s Day, for example.
- Allow extra time for responses. Some people with dementia may take longer to think and speak or may have aphasia. Silence is acceptable and may provide a way for quiet reflection.
- If the person cannot recall Valentine’s Day memories, encourage others in the group to share their own memories.
- A few props, such as Valentine’s cards, hearts, a box of chocolates, balloons, pictures of couples, music, etc. may help to get the conversation started.
- If the person with dementia begins to ask about someone who is no longer living as if she still is, it is helpful to encourage him to share his memories of that person rather than to remind him that the person died.
- The interviewer may wish to record these sessions for future generations. Follow facility policy and obtain permission from the elder and legal decision-maker if applicable before doing so.
- Other holiday memories might be shared at other times as well.
Seniors Remembering Valentine’s Day
Reminiscence can provide a great platform for someone with dementia to enjoy times from the past. As dementia progresses, the long-term memories tend fade as well. A spouse may not recognize a life partner in later stages. Speaking of and preserving memories may be a helpful way to connect with someone who has dementia and to give everyone the chance to enjoy the beauty of the moment.
Source:
8/5/06 online article by Christine Kennard entitled “Reminiscence Therapy and Activities for People with Dementia
Katrena Wells - Katrena Wells is a RN in NC with 17 1/2 years of experience in oncology, an educator since 1995, and has taught exercise classes since ...
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